Running on Empty

Last week I registered for three 5K races: the Gilmanton 5K this Saturday, Todd's Trot 5K on April 10th and The Girls Inc 5K on April 17th. Now I'm having "buyers remorse." I registered for them, which means I actually have to run them. It is always a nice thought: "I'm going to run a race!" But when you're finally locked-in it doesn't seem like such a good idea. I've only ever skipped out on two races: The Vermont Marathon in 2004 and the Tempe Park 5K in 2007.

My Dad actually "paid" me not to run the Vermont Marathon. I had registered and was dead-set on running it even though the race was a week before my college graduation and three weeks before my wedding. I thought I could do it. He convinced me it probably wasn't a good idea and told me he would reimburse me the registration if I didn't run. I held out for a couple weeks but finally gave in and took the "bribe."

When the day of the race finally rolled around I was so glad I had listened to my Dad. The week before I'd gone to the campus health center because I felt like my heart beat was abnormal--like it was constantly "racing." Turns out I was all hopped up on caffeine, and the stress from finals and planning a wedding was taking a toll; my body was trying to tell me to slow down. I didn't feel guilty about not running that race; in fact I was grateful that my Dad had the foresight that I didn't.

I opted out of the Tempe Park 5K because I had some scheduling conflict, which I can't remember the details of. But what I do remember is going to the gym later in the day and running 3.1 miles on the treadmill as fast as I could to "make up" for not going to the race. So even if I did skip out on my up coming races, I'd feel guilty enough to have to re-do it on the treadmill--which is far worse than actually having to run the race.

The thing that has me regretting the race this weekend is sleep depravation. Sophia has reverted back to waking up every 3 to 4 hours at night. Just when I thought we had arrived: two weeks ago she was sleeping through the night: 8pm to 6:30am. And for about three or four weeks before that she would go at least 7 hours, consistently. I've been scratching my head trying to figure out what's going on. I thought it was a growth spurt at first but it has lasted for a little over a week. Our day-time schedule has stayed the same, with the exception that we are off by one hour due to daylight savings.

I'm beginning to wonder if it is just a habit that she has started. I've considered just leaving her when she wakes up, knowing that she can go longer. The problem is we live in a one bedroom apartment: her crib is in our bedroom--there's no were else to put it. So when she wakes up at night, even if she isn't crying I wake up. And then I feed her so both she and I can get back to sleep. It seems like a vicious cycle.

I consulted some of my baby books to try and find a solution and was somewhat excited when I noticed in the index of one of the books a chapter called: "Only One Bedroom." I opened the book to find a very brief paragraph which offered the solution: "have your baby sleep at night in your bedroom and use a sofa bed and convert the living room to a bedroom at night." What? That is your solution?!? First of all, we don't have a pull-out couch. And Second, there's not even enough room in the "living room" for a pull-out couch or even a blow up mattress. And most importantly, why do we have to be displaced? I suppose we could put her in the pack n' play in the living room, but that would mean putting her down in her crib at 7pm, taking her out when we're ready to go to bed at 10pm and putting her back to sleep in a different location and different bed. Not exactly what I'd like as a nighttime routine. And I don't think all the inconsistency would be good for Sophia, either. I've also considered earplugs or perhaps a large fan placed between our bed and her crib to down out her sounds--or maybe both.

I'm hoping this is just a phase. If it isn't I'm going to need to find some way to get more sleep or else I won't be running too many more races. Or if I do, I'll be running on empty.